Homeless

The quarter has ended. I am not profound.

Thanks to not being in school right now, my ability to think has diminished significantly. I can't process any coherant thoughts at all. People keep telling me that this is good. It's good to take a break. Well yes. But my breaks are not condusive to productivity. Are we actually being productive in college? I mean, yes, we're learning, yes. But I really don't know what to do with my friday night.

I moved boxes around.

Today I asked myself a question: what is beauty?

I was at a cafe today. Waiting for a band to play with my friend johnny. There was this woman playing. She was middle aged. High on mushrooms. And her band was not very well coordinated. She was happy though. We were not. It was bad music. But she was happy. And I knew that she felt that her actions were beautiful. And we all know that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. So a construct then. A construct of humans.

Everything is a construct. Everything beyond nature. And I think that is where humans have become unnatural. We make things up. Romance, politics, television, pop music, magazines, diapers, clothes, the trees you see on the side of the road, philosophy, everything is a fucking construct.

I want to go to iceland.

I'm done with covering up reality with fake things. Open your eyes. Look out your window.

Reality has become extinct. We will never know it.